Signs are everywhere, but you need to open your heart see them.
I used to think of myself as quite a down-to-earth, analytical, somewhat sceptical person (studied maths/computer science) and wasn't really into this floaty, spiritual stuff. But by deepening my yoga practice -which started of purely physical- I have started opening myself to new things and by doing that I have started to open my heart. This has been a big effort as going through the trauma of chronic illness and surgery made me build a wall around my heart in order to be able to cope with all the hospital visits, bad news, feeling ill and to not get hurt any deeper. I wanted to work even harder to prove myself and I berated my body for being 'broken'. I started focussing on the negative and was in survival mode. I needed to learn to love myself and my body again. Instead of being disappointed with all the things 'wrong' with me, I needed to focus on the magical recovery my body, mind and spirit were capable of. And once I did that, with the help of yoga, the magic started trickling in.
I started teaching yoga at work over a month ago and it has been the most wonderful experience. Teaching in its own right is a beautiful thing. Teaching yoga has this added quality sharing an experience and energy with people. Why we weren't taught yoga or mindfulness at school is an absolute mystery to me; it has such wisdom, spirituality and is great for physical development. You can touch people's hearts and minds and that is so rare in these times of modern technology, where we seem to be getting more disconnected and isolated. I've had such nice responses to the classes, especially from those people new to yoga. It fills my heart and is breaking down this wall I created... more than that signs are appearing on my path that confirm what deep in my heart I already know, that this is good, this is purposeful and rewarding and this is where I'm headed.
Today I finished reading an inspirational book written by a neurosurgeon, Dr. James Doty called Into the Magic Shop. It is a moving life-story of a man who at a young age was taught to breathe, quiet his mind, open his heart and set an intention. It is a book about human connections, but it also teaches how to do these four exercises and towards the end you'll find his Alphabet of the Heart, which should help to create more compassion and balance. Dr. Doty has helped set up CCARE, a research centre studying the effect of compassion on the heart and brain. Maybe if I practice setting my intention often enough, one day I might get to meet this fascinating man... I am a very slow reader, but I read his book from cover to cover in no time! Please read it if you can.
I'm going to move forward on my path, sharing what I learn with others (another sign in my yoga workshop today, where the 'Teach' card found its way to me) but also showing more gratitude to myself and all those inspirational people I have met so far.